Use These Open-Ended Questions to Connect With Your Preschooler

Parenting a preschooler is a beautiful, chaotic, and deeply rewarding experience. At this stage, their emotions are big, their words are still forming, and their hearts are wide open. As parents, we often wonder—how is my child really feeling? Are they happy? Are they anxious? Do they feel loved and secure?

Since young children may struggle to express complex emotions, open-ended questions can be a powerful way to explore their inner world gently. Instead of asking yes/no questions (“Are you happy?”), asking questions that invite conversation helps them share their thoughts, fears, and joys in their own way.

Below are 10 thoughtful, open-ended questions to ask your preschooler to better understand their emotional health.

These are designed to be casual and engaging—because deep conversations with little ones often happen in the middle of snack time, playtime, or bedtime snuggles.

1. What was the best part of your day? What was the hardest part?

This simple question helps you see what brings your child joy and what might be causing them stress. Maybe they love circle time at preschool but feel nervous about lunchtime because they don’t know where to sit. Their answer can reveal a lot about their social and emotional experiences.

Follow-up question: “What do you wish could be different about the hardest part?”

2. How does your heart feel today?

Young kids may not always have the words for emotions like “frustrated” or “overwhelmed,” but they understand the feelings in their bodies. This question encourages them to check in with themselves.

Alternative phrasing: “If your heart were a color today, what color would it be?”

3. What do you do when you feel sad or mad?

This question gives insight into their coping skills (or lack thereof). Some kids might say, “I go to my room and hug my teddy,” while others might say, “I scream and stomp my feet!” Their response helps you guide them toward healthy ways to express big feelings.

4. Who do you like to spend time with at school (or daycare)? Why?

Social connections are a huge part of emotional well-being. Their answer might reveal who makes them feel safe and happy—or if they’re feeling left out or lonely.

Follow-up: “What do you like to do together?”

5. If you could change one thing about today, what would it be?

This encourages reflection and problem-solving. If they say, “I wish Daddy didn’t have to work so much,” it might be a sign they’re missing connection time.

6. What makes you feel loved?

Even at a young age, kids have different “love languages.” Some might say, “When you cuddle me,” while others might say, “When you play with me.” Their response helps you meet their emotional needs in the way that feels best to them.

7. What do you do when you see a friend feeling sad?

This question helps gauge their empathy and emotional intelligence. Are they learning to comfort others? Do they notice when a friend is upset? If they say, “I don’t know,” it might be an opportunity to teach them kindness and support.

8. What makes you feel brave?

Courage looks different for every child. Maybe it’s going down the big slide for the first time, speaking up in class, or trying a new food. Their answer will show you where they’re finding their confidence.

9. What do you wish grown-ups understood about you?

This question can bring surprising answers. Maybe they feel rushed all the time, or maybe they wish adults played more. Giving them the space to share makes them feel valued and heard.

10. Can you show me with your hands or your face how you feel right now?

For little ones who struggle with words, using their body to express emotions can be easier. If they scrunch up their face and cross their arms, you can gently ask, “Are you feeling frustrated?” and help them label their feelings.

Why These Questions Matter

The goal of these conversations isn’t just to gather information—it’s to make your child feel safe, understood, and emotionally supported. The more you practice open-ended conversations, the more comfortable your child will be expressing themselves.

And remember—sometimes kids won’t have deep answers, and that’s okay. Maybe today, they’ll just giggle and say, “I feel like a dinosaur!” The key is consistency. Keep asking, keep listening, and keep creating a home where emotions are always welcome.

What’s a question that has helped you connect with your preschooler? 💛